always be honest, except for when you lie

Thursday, January 20, 2005

sometimes i say fuck

Before I became a mom I could say fuck all I liked. Fuck this, fuck that. No one cared. Or if anyone did, fuck 'em.

That's all changed. When your three and a half year old is heard uttering the word you are forced to reevaluate your volcablary. Because the last thing you need is for the kid to start cursing the preschool teacher out next time she tells him snack time is over, put it away, push in your chair.

I'd look like a giant ass.

It's all about me.

So that's it for fuck. I'm done with it and it's done with me. I'd like to be one of those people who say ah to hell with it, I'm gonna let my kids swear but I think those people are losers. I certainly have no intention of being a loser. What, and have the preschool teacher think less of me than she no doubt already does? I won't hear of it.

Good Riddance That Bad Word.

There now, almost perfect. All I have to do is listen to classical music all day and throw all four of our TVs out the window and I'm good to go. Granted, I will be but a shadow of my once interesting and happy self but it's all in the name of appearing to be the perfect parent. So it's worth it.

Not that I'll miss saying fuck. It's time for fuck to go anyway.

Bye Fuck.

All the best.